wow!

Hello friends and family! So as you have gathered I am at ministry school in northern California and am learning and experiencing a lot! Last week we focused on the Father's love and how intimate and personal His love is. Honestly I hadn't pursued a deep relationship with Father God until now. I totally love Jesus and have loved Him my whole life but had never realized that since God is triune its important to know and love all three persons of Him.  I encourage you to pursue a relationship with the Father and open your heart and mind to receiving His craaaazy love!! Also, my mindset of "the Father is too Holy and I am unworthy to truly commune with Him" is being broken with all the new realizations I'm having that Jesus SHATTERED that barrier of unworthiness and we freely come to the Father now! 

This week we are learning about the power of prayer and its awesome! Sometimes it's easy to think "does God really hear my prayers to Him? or does He really want to even answer?" and I definitely think those thoughts.  But I'm learning that instead of praying out of hopelessness or sad desperation, if I believe in my heart that God desires good things for us (Jer 29:11, Luke 11:11-13) we pray with Faith and Hope expecting good results and deeper intimacy with Him because of prayer!! In Exodus Moses pleaded with a hope that God would change His mind about wiping people out, and it says "So the Lord changed His mind about the harm which He said He would do to His people," (Exodus 32:14 NASB). Our prayers are powerful!!! 

I also had a hard time reconciling the fact that God seems so violent in the Old Testament.  Over a series of messages and books I had the biggest and best realization that God loves me so much because He sacrificed His one and only precious Son to be crucified for my sin! That is the point where God no longer wanted the separation between us because He loves us so so much! Jesus's life as a sacrifice sufficed God's righteous anger at our sin.  It was made more real to me because I thought about if my parents would give up Ruthie and how great the sacrifice is.  So the intense love to sacrifice His Son for us reveals His heart and love and desire to commune with us and I'm so thankful.

Love you guys

New Adventures in Redding CA!

God is real. God is good. I am going to try and be as real as possible with you. Sometimes the best ideas come at night and therefore I am writing this at 1:04am on an early sunday morning...  The last time many of you read a blog post from me was when I thought I was near death with a fever and swollen ears, eyes, and stomach in the Philippines. What a journey since then! I'm not sure if I was able to share with you that I immediately began to get better after I had an epiphanic moment with God while reading 2 Corinthians 12:9 it says "But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." I realized that in my weakest state of barely being able to breathe in 90% humidity and 90 degrees (along with a fever and swollen everything) I cannot do things on my own strength for the true glory of the Lord. If self is the motivation then the act, no matter how kind or altruistic, is in vain. Maybe it's like the Pharisees and their showy prayers or  so called 'charitable acts'.  Jesus tells us when we give to the needy "don't let your left hand know what your right is doing" Mat 6:3.  Maybe the same applies when you try to evangelize. There cannot be selfish ambition but rather we have to be influenced by love and humility.  The moment I gave up my selfish ambition to be a world-traveler, better surfer, awesome evangelist whatever.... that moment of relinquishing my putrid selfishness was the moment of breakthrough. The next day I felt so much better and I began to make friends with the local village kids and began to have awesome conversations. I learned around 30 visaya words to communicate and just kept loving them with the love of Jesus.  It was incredible. 


After returning from the Philippines I realized a two month time of learning how to love the least of these in a third world country wasn't long enough. I desire to passionately bring the love of God into the poorest of places. To see breakthrough and healing and hope in the destitute.  In my pursuit of mission work and relationship with our triune God I decided to sign up for the school of ministry in Redding, CA.  I worked hard and saved what I made this summer and was able to come  up with half of the tuition for this year. I decided to take a leap of faith and come to northern CA without being totally paid off but still acting responsibly.  I have applied to ten or so jobs up here and have not had any positive responses yet.  I am on a payment plan for the remaining $2000 for tuition (on top of rent and previous college bills per month).  So if anyone feels led to, there is a donate button on this blog page. I didn't actually want to ask anyone for money and I wanted to make it on my own but honestly I have run out of ideas.  But you know what? I think it's going to be ok no matter what.  One thing I know: God is good.  Sometimes I feel lame asking for money considering I'm at a school that believes in miracles and encourages great faith.  But instead of beating myself up thinking "I just don't have enough faith" I think that I need to break off that chain I've put on and realize that there is no more striving in Christ.  He has taken the burdens, the infirmities, the iniquities, and atoned for us and now we are so free and so loved by God and we don't even have to do anything to earn His love.  wow. All we do is receive.  Honestly, just lie on your back with your eyes closed and think about the sacrifice that took place and realize that its done with and receive the love of God stop trying to earn it!  We are no longer on a merit-based system!  We are totally free from that! Amen :) Love you ~Rebecca [ aka Tri :) ]

Right now im in Manila for a few days staying w/ Jan and Tine Hardeman. Maddie met them at westmont's homecoming and they have a ministry here called Faith Academy. They are soooo nice and awesome!

I really miss Siargao already and the friends and culture and nature. The city is so different.
In my last week there the kids were practicing dances for different Christmas parties/productions ... they loooove to dance. I love their moves ;) I love the way the kids/youth interact w/ each other. Even the guys/teens are always putting their arm around eachothers necks and no one cares what people think. They're singing any song just sauntering around town. The girls and guys are best friends punching and laughing eachother and are all like brothers and sisters b/c they are all eachother has. Parents don't worry if their kids are out even at night b/c where are they gonna go? Everybody sits around talking at night and some sing chareoke from their living rooms. The way people walk is even so laid back. They drag their feet and go so slow I lvoe it. No one is in a hurry. People don't care about matching clothes. Girls hold my shoulder or elbow while we walk its normal for them. I find it comforting. The kids/youth love to eat these little pink lollipops that turn their lips pink. I love them too ;).

About some of the poverty here- some people do not have enough food. Rice is essential to them. I asked Leah (13 best friend) what she had for breakfast and she said 'fish' and then paused and asked, 'ate, you have a rice in your place?' I put it together that she was embarassed that she couldnt say fish and rice for breakfast b/c here one should have them together. So I said 'naaah, I only like rice sometimes'. Some kids chew on cardboard to get rid of the hunger feeling. Some kids wear shorts w/ the butt completely ripped open and dont think twice b/c they have nothing else to wear. Some kids have sores all over their legs. A lot of the girls talk about not liking their dark skin. White skin is coveted here. Funny how in the states we have tanning booths... I keep telling them their skin is beautiful. Some kids sell bags of rocks for money for food.

Before one of the kid Christmas parties the hope staff puts on we were bagging gifts (one toothbrush, a few crayons and maybe a toy). We ran out of toys and Jen brought a box of old toys that looked like the toys in Sid's backyard from Toy Story.... I'm thinking, we're giving this as Christmas presents?... Jing said 'dont worry the kids will be glad to get something.' So I got a bottle of rubbing alcohol and rubbed the toys down and bagged them up. When we handed them out at the party they were so stoked. This is all they will receive for Christmas. I asked Jing if she ever got Christmas presents as a kid. She chuckled and said no, no body does but it's ok because its all they know.

At all the Hope Christmas parties they always stress Christmas is about Jesus. And without the gift giving/receiving it seems to center it so much more on Jesus. We have gotten so so so wrapped up in gift giving and Christmas lists in America, it's kindof sad. What if we just skipped the whole present thing one year and had a party with dancing, food, games, fun...

more thoughts to come later.... <3

kids are encouraging

So I was feeling down the other day and I took a walk into town and the kids came running to meet me and were all smiles and like "Ateeee rabeeeeckaaaa!!!!" and they took me inside the town gym that was booming rap music and we went to the fake plant decorations w/ glitter on them and they wiped the glitter all over me and we danced together.

Then the other day I walked into town and the kids were practicing for a Christmas show (doing a dance) and this little boy sat next to me and kissed my arm. He was around 4-5 and was the cutest thing ever.

On the weekends I'm sometimes in charge of taking the kids out surfing. Holy cow they wait with baited breath for the times they can surf and the loooooove catching waves and holding my hand if we both are on the same one!! There's no such thing as bathing suits and its hillarious they just plunge into the water in their dresses, pants, jean shorts whatever.

I read to the pre-schoolers the other day and they were shy at first but then slowly crept closer and then were on my lap and then were fighting over me and putting stickers on my arm and forehead.

I SAW A MILIPEDE! it was as big as.... i dont know like tinkerbell or something. huge

Every time I'm sad or frustrated God helps me to smile b/c of His children here. Seriously they live in these houses made of scraps and palm leaves and they are so happy all the time. They are so encouraging too always saying im guapa even when im like sweating to death.

At youth group on friday night i sat by this girl mary grace and she played w/ my hair and im just so blessed to feel loved by these people.

There's a bunch of Chrstmas programs we're doing and I loooove hearing the preschoolers scream hark the herald angels in their cutest little accents.

love you. let God use you all the time. be willing. amen.

IM ALIVEEEEEE

ok everyone can stop freaking out now!!!!

i love you tons and im totally fine!

after catching the black plague I got some medicine that the free doctor in town 'perscribed' me and then someone texted someone and some random broken jeep brought my medicine. lets just say have you ever felt like pooping your brains out and having to suspend yourself over an outside toilet and not actually let yourself touch any part of the toilet.... but now i feel great! im actually on another island right now here for a surfing festival/competition w/ a bunch of local guys that work for Hope. its awesome and im pretty sure both my ears are having issues but i got some earplugs from an ozzie that was staying at hope for a week. im eating so much food and no more issues. God is good.

 

We had to take two jeeps and two boats to get here and we're staying in this lady's boarding house i think she might have a website "mami's surf house". there's super cool people staying at the house from an island called cebu and they all know english so were like friends already. they sell surf shirts called 'adrenaline' and 'aframe' and one guy sells hippie jewelry and drew an eye on my arm in henna. i forgot how easy it is to make friends when ppl speak your language. I'm here w/ Derek and a couple f/ canada so the four of us are basically the only white people and lets just say absolutely everyone without question stops what they are doing to stare... aaaah kindof getting annoying sometimes. but its funny.

 

today we woke up way to early to go surfing and rode some crazy trike thing that im pretty sure was on the verge of falling apart and surfed in super shallow reef. 

 

 I'm like trying to still figure out what my purpose is here but im reading psalm 137 and it says the Lord will fulfill his purpose in you. so if i keep that attitude hopefully He'll use me for his glory.

 

i love you tons.

love me

 

the motherload blog

First of all, it is veeeery hot here. I'm pretty sure there is not a moment when I'm not sweating. It's 100% humidity here and always 80+ degrees. I sweat when I surf and the ocean is the temperature of Ruthie's bath.

Second of all, Philipinos looooove Christmas. When I got off the plane in Manila, they were blasting the Christmas tunes alongside other American favorites like rihanna and T-pain. So glad our entertainment media is positively influencing the entire world....not....

After one night in Manila with Jen (ministry 'co leader' i would say, other leader= husband Derek, which by the way I really admire that they operate basically in partnership/as a team in the whole ministry of Hope for the Island. They both are vital founders and heads of the ministry here) and after already sweating through two shirts we landed in Siargao (pronounced shur i gow = this is the name of the whole island, not to be confused with Surigao/ sur i gow city the main city on this island) and walked off the plane past the 'airport' (one room shack with welcome sign) and hopped in some old guy's van (um pieces of metal held together with rope) for a 1.5 hr drive into the jungle and made it to Hope for the Island! Its so green and so hot/humid its unlike any other experience in my life! I'm expecting Mighty joe young or george of the jungle to come romping out of the trees any second.

As Jen is showing me around the house w/ tin roof and made of coconut wood she takes me to the "CR" or bathroom and shows me how I'm to bathe with a spiget of rain water that pours into a bucket i can pour on myself and how i am to flush the toilet by pouring cups of rain water down the toilet. wow. she also says to "be careful of your dirty laundry b/c the rats like to nibble any little things" yikes. Hope has a basketball court, schoolroom, 1/2 pipe, volleyball court, boys living quarters, girls living quarters, and visitor's cottage. They have gutters everywhere that collect rainwater into barrels that we use for everything.

Hope consists of 8 20-something year old ladies, many of whom grew up in the village and 3 20-something year old guys. It's super cool that they have hired the local people to run the place. The girls are pre-school teachers in the morning, and ministry leaders in the afternoon. Each day there's a Bible study or youth group or something. Two of the guys work on the farm thats a ways a way so they dont come to Hope till the weekend. The other guy is the all around handy man and keeper of the sports equipment. Kids come and hangout here all day long on the weekends and after school on the weekdays. It's super cool b/c its a safe place and fun and encouraging them to love God.

One of my favorite things is to go into the village (next door, like 2 min walk) and hangout with the kids there. I love experiencing a different way of life and seeing the rice and coconut spread out all over the road to dry and the kids playing games wtih colored rubber bands and basket ball. The funniest thing is how these basically shacks are blasting Kesha's Tic Tok and Lady Gaga. Also, a ton of kids have cell phones -granted they're modest nokias that look like they've been through 10 other people but still! It's interesting to see how these things are important to them i guess?

Here if you're a girl over 15 you are an auntie and a guy is cuya. So I'm Auntie Rebecca and I love it. It's so awesome to see how devoted the ladies I live with are to the people of the village. They are so loving and everyone lights up when we walk into town. Lets just say the biggest bummer for me right now is the language barrier. I hate not being able to get to know people because we don't understand eachother. But everybody knows a little english and I'm trying to learn Visaya so we're working at it... ;)

Its super cool how clothes, makeup, things are of little importance here. I think there's one small mirror in the whole house I'm in. People just dont seem to put so much importance on it.

also there are massive bees and black wasps and tiny gnats that suck your blood and GIANT bats. And the geckos chirp all the time and there's a coconut grove next to me where I wandered over w/ one of the girls to ask a guy if we could eat one. He got me a 'botong' young coconut b/c this is a delicacy and it was slimy and sour.... not quite what i expected... yum ;)

I want to say more but I'm afraid this is getting too long so I'll close by saying I'm learning a lot and have a lot of time to think and time to sweat. God is good all the time and it is so beautiful to see how Hope has affected this island and how the people and many kids are starting to grasp how Jesus loves them so much.

Check it next sunday for more!!

praise God!!!

I'm not sure how often I'm gonna update this but hopefully I'll get some chances to let people know how the love of Jesus is penetrating the philippines! 


Thanks so much for your love and support and prayer. God is sovereign and I'm so thankful and excited He's made a way for me to go to the philippines. 


"Ministry, however, is simply about loving the person in front of you. It's about stopping for the one and being the very fragrance of Jesus to a lost and dying world." - Heidi Baker, Compelled By Love


Anyone is in ministry if they chose to be. At home, in the city, in the ocean, in other countries. anywhere. Jesus already loves us. He already died for us. Accept His love and experience the freedom and comfort and joy that comes with Him!